I see many couples who come to my office with the presenting problem that they “cannot communicate.” All couples communicate! Problems develop when the sender of the messages is unable to switch to the role of receiver of the partners messages in conversations. They may only be hearing and focused on what “they have to say” and their agenda and forget to listen to the partner. Developing healthy communication skills takes work and practice. Couples will be given take home assignments to practice learned techniques and be asked to report back on their experience.
Relationships require work and are bound to face challenges large and small. Simple, everyday stressors can strain an intimate relationship, and major sources of stress may threaten the stability of the relationship. As long as each partner is willing to address the issue at hand and participate in developing a solution, most relationship problems are manageable. But when challenges are left unaddressed, tension mounts, poor habits develop, and the health and longevity of the relationship are in jeopardy.
Some common relationship concerns I’ve counseled include but are not limited to financial difficulties, barriers to communication, routine conflict, emotional distance, sexual intimacy issues, and lack of trust.
Depending on the relationship I may ask to see each individual separately. Damage may be to the extent that one partner may feel that they cannot comfortably share their feelings or perceptions in front of the other. These sessions will take place 1-3 times and it will be determined what needs to take place for a safe environment to be formed.
When Food is Love-----Geneen Roth
Fat is a Family Affiar-----Judi Hollis
Food for Love----- Janet Greesen
Binge No More-----Joyce Nash
Love to Eat- Hate to Eat-----Elyse Fitzpatrick
Codependent No More-----Melody Beattie
Beyond Codependency-----Melody Beattie
Facing Codependency---- Pia Mellody
The 5 Love Languages----- Gary Chapman
The Seven Principles for Making a Marriage Work----John Gottman
Surviving Infidelity-----R. Subotnik and G. Harris
His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage-----Willard F. Jr. Harley
Boundaries in Marriage-----Henry Cloud John Townsend